Egomet

May 25, 2005

Bedeutung

External world and its sense….its creation…the creation of sense…..anyone can create it…as well as “anyone can play guitar”, and I believe anyone can create a meaning to a Camilo Pessanha’s poem (obviously it will vary from reader to reader, but that’s how poetry is!).
How do I perceive my own words? In a psycholinguistic perspective, probably as parts of my mental dictionary (computational metaphor), but the way they are perceived by others….probably as part of an encyclopaedia because they are differently perceived by each reader. The way I change my mood in different situations makes me feel stupid..makes me feel strong…makes me feel I got something I don’t know what it is…I perceive my own ideas and words sometimes in a wrong way! (How ridiculous it is when we establish misconceptions about ourselves!)
I could simply whisper…or I could simply start shouting….someone would create a meaning to my behaviour…it is stronger than ourselves….Even the absurd has a meaning….and laughing at it is even more meaningful!
Which is the value of my linguistic signs, which is the meaning of their contents, how do I form a lexical field in my mental dictionary….which are my definitions….I am not thinking only about the way I use language…but also the way this use influences all my thoughts, all my perceptive system. Where is the origin of meaning…do we bake it the way we bake a cake? Do we reach it the way birds make a nest? Do we establish it the way butterflies search for flowers? I know for sure that it is impossible to taste the meaning of things taking them as particular events….isolated events make no sense….only unifying these events makes sense…and probably that’s how we create meanings. Believing they do not simply exist….makes me search for them..not only when I use and perceive language…but also in non-linguistic events. The way meanings are created is amazing….I can simply stand still observing the sunset and even with an absence of words it has a meaning my perceptive system computes…encodes…stores…stimulates my being…my soul..my body and my mind. This is an isolated meaning..because I am the only one who is perceiving the moment this way…the only one who is constructing a given meaning to a given moment, probably already experienced by most human beings. Thus, I paraphrase Nietzsche’ words…Who speaks? Words themselves? Or those who use these words?
We can speak and, even so, sometimes those produced words have no meaning at all. So many times I use the wrong words to express my thoughts….when I want to express them! Words must be produced in order to transmit the meaning we want them to have…they do not speak by themselves, I believe! That’s why we use metaphors…and its amazing consequence is the wonderful world of flying meanings!
Running through the paths of my being…running through the amazingly stupid worries…I realize the meaning I create for them is completely meaningless. Sometimes even my words are meaningless…Do I create meanings for my worries…or they already have meanings? I believe this is the same as in language, in the use of words…I create my worries’ meanings….and that’s why sometimes they seem so absurd…because I am the only one who creates them this way.

Egomet

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